When we view people in our networks as chess pieces to move to our advantage, we sacrifice infinite possibility on the altar of a set agenda.
There have been times in my life when I wouldn’t participate in anything social unless I felt that (a) I had something to offer or (b) there was something in it for me to gain.
During these periods I would become narrowly focused on the advancement of my career, while severely limiting the opportunities for magic, serendipity and true connection.
Constantly assessing and evaluating the worthiness of a person, interaction or experience is symptomatic of a transactional mindset. And everyone around you can feel it.
It’s also based on the operating belief that your abundance comes from beyond yourself – that other people are responsible for your fulfillment and success, and consequently your failures.
The transactional mindset views people as opportunities, stepping-stones or income. Often the transactional mind enters into conversation with:
• A preset notion of how this person can serve me
• An idea of how this person might pay for something I need
• An expectation of new business opportunity
• A feeling that this person might “save” me in some way
When the other person falls short of any of these attachments, you walk away feeling disappointed or worse – and they walk away feeling discarded, used or worse. This is no foundation on which to build a working relationship – or any other kind of relationship for that matter.
Missed Opportunities
When we approach introductions, networking events or negotiations with a “get” mentality, we lose the opportunity to actually connect and create authentically. When we view people in our networks as chess pieces to move to our advantage, we sacrifice infinite possibility on the altar of a set agenda.
In order to cultivate collaborative allies and be in creative flow with your business, the question is not “how can this serve me?” but “how can I engage authentically and allow for whatever wants to come?”
This is the heart of being in service to your purpose.
